A Brief History of Films We’ve Seen on Dates*

When we were big on dating, we preferred dates that didn’t interfere with our very busy drinking schedule. As a result, we usually just had a half-dozen cocktails or so and called it a night and then got dressed and went home. But on a few occasions, gentlemen callers convinced us to attend a moving picture while sober. Here, as far as our repressed memories will allow us, is a list of the films we saw. Amelie

The Bourne Identity (He went to prison a month later)

Maid in Manhattan (We met him in a KMart on Christmas Eve)

Talk to Her (We came home with bruised earlobes. Earlobes!)


The Stepford Wives

In a Lonely Place

Bad Education (He was 24 and planning a couple of grand in plastic surgery)

Sideways (Witch)

Masculine-Feminine (He had a better time when we watched Win a Date with Tad Hamilton)

The Amityville Horror


The Squid and the Whale

Wedding Crashers

King Kong

Keeping Mum

Shadowboxer (The most inappropriate choice)

Factory Girl


Broken English (The second most inappropriate choice)

I Know Who Killed Me (That whole day was a mistake)



(*This streetwalk down memory lane brought up some serious PTSD)

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